To pee or not to pee

I have not been feeling well. Seems like everyone I know is sick. But I was getting Dad changed today and he was a little fractious and I had to insist that it was better to be clean and dry and started quoting the Bard to amuse him. Here is what I started:

To pee, or not to pee: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the pants to suffer
The moist and cold of damp underwear,
Or to take arms against a sea of pea,
And by opposing change them? To change: to clean;
No more; and by a change to say we end
The diaper-rash and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, when wet
Devoutly to be wish'd. To change, to clean;
To clean: perchance to dry: ay, there's the rub;
For in that cleansing what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this wet clothing,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes pleasure of dry and warm;
For who would bear the cold and moist of pee,
The caregiver's right, the dry man's happyy,
The pangs of damp garments, the chill of wetness,
The insolence of the wet and the odor
That patient denies a need of driness,
When he himself might his urine make
With a bare bum? who would object,
To grunt and sweat in a bathroom,
But those that change the wet,
The undiscover'd dampness from within
No caregiver shuns, it puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Not seen as yet
Thus squeamishness does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native feelings of revulsoion
Is chased o'er with the vivid cast of love,
And changes of great volume and mass
With this regard our senses are awry,
And lose the smellof lysol - it cannot hide
The scent of urine, in thy pants
Be all my changes remember'd.

It is silly I know and a bit over the top, but it kept us amused!