Most Powerful Woman in the Nation

Who would that be? The power to leap tall buildings? The power to control the fate of the nation with just one phone call? Well that would be me. Yep, I am feeling pretty proud of myself right now. Who knew?

Dad and I were sitting in the living room mulling over life while we waited for the roofer to show up for our estimate. Soon Dad starts to make distressed noises. And our conversation goes something like this:
"Oh dear" Dad says
"What's up?" I ask
"I don't want to go back" he answers.

As this is out of the blue I am trying to figure out where we are, back to college, the army, his mother's, etc. And you can't just ask as I would look silly to Dad.

So, I matter of factly say "Then don't go."
"Oh I have to go" he replies.
"No, you don't, you are special, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

Just as I feared Dad looks at me like I have lost my mind. At this point I figure the jig is up.

Dad very seriously explains that he has to go back to the Army. His pass has ended and if he does not go back, he will go to jail. Now this is new territory to me as I have never faked a war before. (Dad attended atomic blasts in Nevada during the Korean War.) I don't have any spare atomic weapons laying around so I am going to have to do some fast thinking.

"Well Dad" I say. "We will just call them and quit."
"You can't do that" Dad says scandalized.
"I can." I reply matter of factly.

So I pick up the phone, press some numbers and begin the following monologue.

"This is George Jackson's daughter. (pause) Yes, his social is xxx-xx-xxxx. (pause) He is a Corporal (pause). Well, he doesn't want to be in the Army anymore. (pause) Yes that is right. (pause) Well, thank you very much. Please send all final paperwork or his belongings to our address. (pause) Thank you.

Then I turned to Dad and said, you are out of the Army. Dad looked at me and said "Well I guess I will take a nap then." And off to bed he toddled.